Victory Update
Take Time to Share Your Heart
Americans live at a frantic pace. I am American. I am not sure what the rest of the world is experiencing, but contemporary life here in the good ole' U S of A just doesn't fit into Mark Twain's lazy days of floatin' down the Mississippi. That is a bygone era (if there ever was one).
Where does the time go? I don't know about you, but I have no idea, not even a clue! But what I do know is that it goes! The piles on my desk attest to the fact. The hurried sermon prep, the unwashed car, rhe cluttered garage all reveal that my life is usually run behind schedule. So, most of us find ourselves immersed in our own very busy lives, Any moments of reflection provoke us to wonder where it all went, Though we often get the required tasks done, in my observations, few of us get done what needs to get done.
How is this busy life impacting our families? What is it doing to my relationship with my wife? When am I finding time to influence my children and love them toward God? The example I am living, is it leading those I love to a stronger faith in God? As Christian patents, we have a lot of things to accomplish in this time-limited, time-pressured life. How are we doing? It would be easy to walk away with a serious guilt trip. That is not my intention. As I look at my wife and her needs and my children and their needs I become even more frustrated with the pressures of life. Sometimes it is like I am watching a movie where the scene before me is one that I want to stand up and scream at the people on the screen, "no, don't do that, can't you see what will happen?" But no one listens. I am helpless to change it. The scene just keeps on going. As I evaluate my family and what I am doing to serve God and lead my wife and children toward Him, sometimes I feel like I see what is happening, but I am helpless to change it] As I see the schedule and notice that it is leaving out the needed time with my wife, or children, 1 hclplenly plod along keeping the schedule. At rimes we strive to make people happy. Perhaps we hate to think it, but we also attempt to make God happy by checking off a tick-list of righteous acts. It is as if I must accomplish my lists and responsibilities (both biblical and cultural). "The show must go on," you know!
No, the show need not go on. If it must, perhaps it needs to without you! What must go on is much simpler than what is being pressed upon us by our culture (and well-meaning Christians). What must go on is that our spouses need us to encourage them; on to love and good works, to walk with God (Hebrews 10:24). Our children must have the time with us that they need to learn from us who God is and why we serve Him with all our hearts, souls, minds, and strength (Deuteronomy 6). For more on how to do this, check out the Resource Review on the book Everyday Talk.
As a simple test of initial perceptions; have your spouse ask your children what you do and what you love. I am humbled to think of what my children would say. They see me spend a lot of time and focus on my job and the daily details of life. I am not sure they would initially say that I spend my time serving God. I am afraid they would see me as a person that runs a boys home. As well, I hope they would say that I love mommy and then God, but they might equally say that I love to take naps, watch TV spend time at the office, hunt, fish, travel, golf, et. al.
I am not questioning whether you or I love God. That is for another time. I am assuming we love God. The question of the moment is two-fold. First, do we live like we love God more than the details, pleasures, and duties of this world (Deuteronomy 6:4-6) i Secondly, do we take the time to communicate that to our spouses and children (Deuteronomy 6:7-9, 20-25)? If they by chance miss that, then they miss everything of real value, for eternity.
I believe we need to answer the above two questions by first focusing our hearts on God, Deuteronomy 6:4-6 are very clear that we must not just consider that God is important, "God is great, God is good, now we thank him for our food" (our normal, daily acknowledgement of God) is not an end, it is a beginning! The verses clearly say that we are to "love the Lord our God with all [our] heart, and with all [our] soul, and with all [our] might."
I would love a big HD TV (bigger is better!). I would also love a Convertible Vette (72, black). My idol of choice is comfort. As Paul Tripp outlines in his book Age of Opportunity, it could just as well be control, success, respect, or appreciation. My point is that there are many choices that we make each day that move our hearts away from worshiping God and toward worshiping the creation (and ultimately self, see Romans 1:25). It isn't that it is a sin to get, have, and enjoy, but is that our focus? If that is our focus then ultimately what we pass on to our children is a focus on self. What are you passing on?
Do we really love the Lord with all our might? Is my whole heart totally given to Him? If it is, my schedule often teaches differently. How about yours? As Luke 6:45 states that our behavior is a revealer of our hearts, what does our schedule reveal about where our hearts are focused? What should a person that is loving the Lord with all really look like? Back in Deuteronomy we see an answer. Chapter 6 verse 20 reveals that our lives should provoke our children to ask why we live so differently from everybody else, and what do all these things God has commanded really mean? A life that is "caught up" with God, isn't "caught up" with houses, cars, electronics, vacations, retirement, clothes, and restaurants. Deuteronomy 6:10-12 gives an eerily accurate warning to avoid this. Verse six of the same chapter says that we are to take the words that God has communicated to us about life (His commands, statutes, testimonies) and make them a part of our hearts (inner man— the real us!).
Secondly, we must^ree up the resources to enable us to communicate that focus to our spouse and children, I believe that in our society it takes money to live (in fact, more and more of it!). If I said otherwise I would lose all credibility as a (somewhat) sane person. The verses in chapter six have something to say here as well. Verses 11-14 warn that when we have houses full of stuff] and life is easy, beware of leaving your commitment to God and serving and worshipping what the others around you are serving and worshipping. Are these verses applicable in our culture? Are they applicable to you and me? Yea. We need a shift in thinking from, "how much can I get to live on," to "how much do I need to live on." We all have different incomes and expenses. Some expenses are, to a large degree fixed, some are discretionary. We have all heard the saying, "you either have time or money." I fear that we have lost track of the fact that the pursuit of money takes time. Time is something we think a lot about, but perhaps we don't think about just how valuable it is. When we are given the responsibility to diligently teach our children about our love for God and His instructions for life, verse 7 of chapter 6 begs us to see the value of time. In that verse God explicitly commands us to take the time all through the day to have proximity and purpose in our interaction with our children. A good summary of the teaching in these verses would be, "all throughout your day, diligently teach your children about the God that resides in your heart." That takes time. Time then is immensely valuable. A new car, a bigger house, nice clothes, and eating out not only aren't necessary, but because of the time investment required to obtain them, they aren't even worth it! Some of those things can take away and hinder our ability to influence our children (and spouse) toward God.
In this short article it isn't possible to give you an outline of steps to take to solve each individual's specific time problems. There are many books that deal with time management, read away. I do hope though, that you will look closely at the two key thoughts outlined here. As you head toward the end of the year take time to reflect on the focus of your heart. What needs to change about your focus? After you evaluate, and adjust your heart's focus, assess your time resources. With the correct focus you will find the time resources you are looking for. Make those adjustments that need to be made so you can free up your resources to have the time to reach your children's hearts. A summary of the truths found in Deuteronomy 6: 20-25 reveals the fruit of living God's commands for life: So that, when your child asks you in time to come, saying, what is all this Bible and God stuff, you will hear their question, wrap your arms around them and tell them all that God has done for you and how much you love Him.